tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post7832132720962896040..comments2023-11-02T06:36:15.996-04:00Comments on The Thinking Black Man: Married to THE BOSS...The Thinking Black Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04618989261377257387noreply@blogger.comBlogger20125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post-495409178864817472008-10-26T17:09:00.000-04:002008-10-26T17:09:00.000-04:00You all sound so young. I used to be like you but ...You all sound so young. I used to be like you but over the years she has just worn me down. I am actually really happy since I stopped resisting. I do act immaturely like a child. She has become my parent. Some time ago, I was irresponsible with my credit cards and had them taken away. She came to my rescue with a debit card for children. Ditto the internet. Now I have Net Nanny on my computer. Ditto email, I'm on "Kidmail" Ditto the television, parental controls. Last year she told me that she didn't feel like the consequences she was giving me were effective and since I was acting like a child, she would begin spanking me. I had immages of hot naughty sex but reality is she uses her hairbrush over her knee on my bare bottom and there is nothing pleasant about it.But...I'm really, really happy. Go figure.BabyBoyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16758011363769304918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post-52292827135464603572007-03-20T21:39:00.000-04:002007-03-20T21:39:00.000-04:00Im single (ok divorced, but that was loong ago), a...Im single (ok divorced, but that was loong ago), and I need my time alone, so I dont begrudge a man his. If mates let each other do things that make them happy, then theyll be happier mates; think about it!<BR/><BR/>But yeah, Ive seen some couples who had so many issues, I wanted to ask them why they were together, lol. But I keep my mouth shut!<BR/><BR/>LLola Getshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07058543308191117858noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post-24334430511785333322007-03-14T14:35:00.000-04:002007-03-14T14:35:00.000-04:00How were these men before they got married? How d...How were these men before they got married? How did they behave? Something tells me, not much has "changed". They were probably scared and running behind their girlfriends (future wives) since way back when......no?<BR/><BR/>And if not, I wonder what caused the switch. Could it have been the notion of "marriage" alone? Hmmmm......Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post-86902666683862821182007-02-23T01:55:00.000-05:002007-02-23T01:55:00.000-05:00Dear Lord, I'd have run from any of these guys you...Dear Lord, I'd have run from any of these guys you mentioned in your post! Too bad there isn't a "Real Man" drop squad or something to "re-educate" these brothers!Miss Jhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04009015008528939882noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post-87384599838583823342007-02-22T18:48:00.000-05:002007-02-22T18:48:00.000-05:00Thank you for adding me to your blogger roll. I w...Thank you for adding me to your blogger roll. I will do the same for your blog and then it is time to turn in (being that it is 2am in S. Africa).<BR/><BR/>Be well Brother.<BR/><BR/>Peace and struggle,<BR/>RidwanRidwanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16758153484699728802noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post-3579327226061483272007-02-22T16:15:00.000-05:002007-02-22T16:15:00.000-05:00Hello RIDWAN LAHER!Welcome Brother and thank you v...Hello <B>RIDWAN LAHER</B>!<BR/><BR/>Welcome Brother and thank you very much for taking the time to read my blog and leave me a comment. ESPECIALLY such a postive one from so far away.<BR/><BR/>The people that read this blog and take a few moments to share their thoughts simply humble me. I'm glad to add you to that list.<BR/><BR/>Peace unto you-<BR/>Fight the power-<BR/><BR/>TTBMThe Thinking Black Manhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04618989261377257387noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post-67325461755674056962007-02-22T15:55:00.000-05:002007-02-22T15:55:00.000-05:00I really enjoyed reading your posts here in very h...I really enjoyed reading your posts here in very hot South Africa (yep you made me think too).<BR/><BR/>Can't comment too much on the married friend thing cause I'm still single (and happy) at 42 ;)<BR/><BR/>But, I really identified with your comments on race and the media (advert of dancing Black youth).<BR/><BR/>As a Howard alum it is also nice to keep up on your thoughts/experiences in DC.<BR/><BR/>Thanks for blogging.<BR/><BR/>Peace and struggle,<BR/><BR/>Ridwan<BR/>http://ridwanlaher.blogspot.com/Ridwanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16758153484699728802noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post-62561641299755041332007-02-21T11:30:00.000-05:002007-02-21T11:30:00.000-05:00What's up SLAPHAPPY GEMINI?Yeah, I'm with you - I'...What's up <B>SLAPHAPPY GEMINI</B>?<BR/><BR/>Yeah, I'm with you - I've seen the guys that fork over every penny of their salary and then Mama... uh, the Missus' gives them a few dollars for the week.<BR/><BR/>It's one thing, to deposit money in the house hold bank account for family and living expenses, but when a guy takes the childlike positon of waiting for his allowance from Mommy, I have to shake my head.'<BR/><BR/><B>GUNFIGHTER!</B> Yeah, man - I left Mama back at home when I set out to become a man. When I got married, I was looking for a wife!<BR/><BR/>-You know <B>ANALI</B>, I think that when some people get married, they feel as though they STOP being who they are. They are no longer BOB or DAVE or LISA... they become TINA'S husband, KEVIN'S wife... they just become a title. <BR/><BR/>They feel like having friends and having a good time WITHOUT their title-holder is a bad thing and something that should be avoided, like is wrong or something. It's crazy. <BR/><BR/>Hey <B>T-HYPE</B> I'm laughing at your comment, but sadly I agree. They'll be headed to divorce court before long and she'll be heading to the police station for a Restraining Order!!!<BR/><BR/>Hey Big Sis' <B>CREOLEINDC</B>! I thank God everyday for not having this kind of insane drama in my marriage! I have a good buddy of mine and his marriage [like mine - I'd like to believe] is made up of TWO normal and secure individuals, that are solidly joined in marriage but still have typical lives as individuals. You just don't STOP being an individual when you say I do. Do you? <BR/><BR/>Thank you <B>BLACK CHIC THINKING</B>! I actually wanted to add on about 4 MORE stupid things insecure husbands do, but I didn't want to get a rock thrown through my window!!!<BR/><BR/>Hey <B>ONEFROMPHILLY</B>!<BR/>Thanks for assuring me that I was normal. I was starting to wonder if I was doing something wrong... you know - trusting my wife; having my friends; and not being scared to let her have HER friends and all.<BR/><BR/>I love the comment "Restrictions always cause rebellion" I'll have to remember that one.<BR/><BR/>Hey <B>TASHA</B>! What's going on?<BR/><BR/>That's a good point you raise. I halfway wonder if some women that tend to be stronger and more controlling <B>seek out</B> more docile and obedient men to marry?<BR/><BR/>That's a really good point.<BR/><BR/>I'm really going to think about that. It's definately something going on here, and I'm not sure what. When I talk to these guys, they don't come off as weak or whupped - but the minute something comes up that involves time and "checking in on the family schedule" these guys CHANGE. You can almost see them go into a shell and either begin to hide or begin to "lay the groundwork for the bail-out" <BR/><BR/>"Laying the groundwork..." to me, is when they start adding little comments like, "Oh, I should be able to make the game if my mother won't need me to take her to the airport..." or my favorite, "I think my wife's family is coming in town that weekend." : )<BR/><BR/>What's up <B>THEO J</B>?<BR/><BR/>Absolutely man. I jokingly call my wife the Colonel or the General depending on my mood. But it is always tongue-in-cheek. God knows what she calls me!<BR/><BR/>But we have a respect for each other... we make our family time our first priority and then we make sure we BOTH have time to get out from under each other have our time to do what we want alone or with friends... like you said - it's about courtesy and respect. Thanks for the comment!The Thinking Black Manhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04618989261377257387noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post-15561898055090891062007-02-20T23:50:00.000-05:002007-02-20T23:50:00.000-05:00Good post. I agree, a man shouldn't have to be afr...Good post. I agree, a man shouldn't have to be afraid of his wife in that way. I joke about asking permission, but I ask out of common courtesy and I expect the same from her. Respect is a two-way street. There's no reason to be scared of each other.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post-11793255059284792382007-02-20T17:05:00.000-05:002007-02-20T17:05:00.000-05:00I always hear women calling their husbands their o...I always hear women calling their husbands their other child. That's joke-worthy but only to a point. There's no need to treat your spouse that way, nor should you be quaking in your boots when you see her.<BR/><BR/>Maybe I'm thinking too hard, but this seems to be a problem with a number of black women. I am left to wonder if this subset of black women spent so many of their formative years learning how to be strong independent career women and mothers that they never learned how to be a wife.Tashahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05841784678107146378noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post-76278361889208442802007-02-20T13:06:00.000-05:002007-02-20T13:06:00.000-05:00Just in case you were wondering, YOU have the norm...Just in case you were wondering, YOU have the normal marriage. And I'm speaking from a woman's view. Your 3 friends are trippin!!! Putting collars (self imposed or not)on a spouse like any of those three situations leads to cheating. Restrictions always cause rebelliononefromphillyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14107334845943040309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post-13864563957245983962007-02-20T12:19:00.000-05:002007-02-20T12:19:00.000-05:00I ♥ this entry, actually sent it over to a girlfri...I ♥ this entry, actually sent it over to a girlfriend or two who have these hubby problems.Nice post!Rick Strellmanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03703482722618691626noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post-70793971630600762812007-02-19T22:28:00.001-05:002007-02-19T22:28:00.001-05:00You're right...marriage shouldn't be painful and w...You're right...marriage shouldn't be painful and we should be thankful that ours isn't.<BR/><BR/>*waving* HEY TTBM!CreoleInDChttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02191794698013658999noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post-47894129265319952362007-02-19T22:28:00.000-05:002007-02-19T22:28:00.000-05:00You're right...marriage shouldn't be painful and w...You're right...marriage shouldn't be painful and we should be thankful that ours isn't.<BR/><BR/>*waving* HEY TTBM!CreoleInDChttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02191794698013658999noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post-74757783548068175542007-02-19T14:37:00.000-05:002007-02-19T14:37:00.000-05:00One of my girlfriends is married to a "man #3" and...One of my girlfriends is married to a "man #3" and believe me, it's just as annoying to her as it is to you.<BR/><BR/>I don't think they're going to make it. When your wife says, "I thought you were out having fun with your friends. Why are you calling me?" it's not a good sign...t-HYPEhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12754869629100022097noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post-56061226389598572032007-02-19T13:44:00.000-05:002007-02-19T13:44:00.000-05:00I'm not married, so I don't know how much I can co...I'm not married, so I don't know how much I can comment, but I don't understand the whole parenting style of marriage. I think it's good to have some alone time and time with your friends. I don't see how one person can be everything in your life. <BR/><BR/>I understand checking in, but not needing permission. And if you think that every time your spouse leaves the house they are cheating on you, then why would you want to stay married to them? I mean if they are out all night, that's one thing, but just normal going out???Lisa Johnsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08096947438461486505noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post-26019428063239199112007-02-19T08:48:00.000-05:002007-02-19T08:48:00.000-05:00Trust me when I tell you, that my wife keeps our s...Trust me when I tell you, that my wife keeps our social calendar... what we are doing with our daughter, church activities, school happening, Girl Scouts, etc... but I think tha thtere is a vast difference between those things and asking for <I>permission</I> to anything else.<BR/><BR/>Damn... she is my wife, not my mother.Gunfighterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05762432006297768871noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post-32235655183703744862007-02-18T12:02:00.000-05:002007-02-18T12:02:00.000-05:00Yo, you said 'wimpy husband syndrome'...ha ha ha. ...Yo, you said 'wimpy husband syndrome'...ha ha ha. That's going down in the archives for sure! I recently had a conversation with a few married guys at work, and I was aghast to hear how some of those grown-ass, working men get an allowance from their spouse. An allowance!...I didn't get an allowance when I was a kid, so there's no way in Chinese Monkey Hell I'll be subjected to such emasculation as a man. My view on marriage is much like you described; it should be something that two whole people can benefit from by mutually loving, and honoring, and cherishing one another. But then again, what do I know? Maybe that's why I'm still single....SlapHappy Geminihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13245341075088775598noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post-33078136713491858752007-02-17T11:50:00.000-05:002007-02-17T11:50:00.000-05:00Hey GUNFIGHTER-How's it going Brother? Slip-Slidi...Hey <B>GUNFIGHTER</B>-<BR/><BR/>How's it going Brother? Slip-Sliding around like me I'm sure!<BR/><BR/>Tonight is poker night, so that's why all this wimpy husband non-sense is on my mind! We still don't know if we're having 4 players or 7 because of this Wimpy Husband Syndrome.<BR/><BR/>So, you know guys that are doing this stuff too, huh?<BR/><BR/>What is this all about, I wonder?The Thinking Black Manhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04618989261377257387noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17150866.post-80886768593951263082007-02-17T09:42:00.000-05:002007-02-17T09:42:00.000-05:00Man... I think this is spreading!This sounds like ...Man... I think this is spreading!<BR/><BR/>This sounds like so many of the guys I work with, it isn't even funny.<BR/><BR/>Like you, I don't make plans without making sure that we aren't cross-scheduling... but PERMISSION? <BR/><BR/>And about the dude who is afraid his wife will cheat if she goes out with the guirls.... anybody can do ANYthing if they want. It doesn't have to happen at happy hour.<BR/><BR/>Talk about insecurity...Gunfighterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05762432006297768871noreply@blogger.com