I used to post my thoughts several times a week. I didn't care what people thought about 'em, I thought 'em, I wrote 'em, I loved 'em. If something crossed my mind, I went like a mad man to my laptop.
Then I added a little counter to my blog and I was tickled that I got 10 or 12 hits a day. And after that I added this cool little global hit tracker code on my blog and I was blown away by folks reading my blog from all over the world. Then I REALLY started noticing these two counters... my daily hits went from a few, to a few dozen, to a few hundred everyday. I watched as my blog hits rocketed out of the hundreds and tens of thousands and flew past the 20, and 25 thousand hit mark and folks from all across Europe and Africa and Asia and the Middle East and The Americas started reading my stuff and I suddenly got full of myself. Don't get me wrong - I'm blessed and humbled by the readership on my blog, but I started to get worried about who might get offended, and who might not like what I say, and I started thinking harder and harder about what I should write and I started taking days and days to pick 'just the right subject'. Then I started feeling like I wasn't being true to myself and the things that caught my attention, I think I got kinda' big headed, like I had betrayed the guy that started this blog.
Then I happened past a great blog called "Write For Life" which is run by one of my favorite bloggers - MIZREPRESENT. And she had a quote from someone that read in effect, "it's better to write for yourself and have no audience, than it is to write for an audience and have no self." That has stayed with me, and here I am.
going for self...
Recently, the NAACP had a big funeral service for The N-word. I thought that was a nice thing to do, seeing that I personally hate the damn word! I always think that the NAACP needs to do more things to regain its position of promenance in the Black community, and I thought this was a decent start. Burying the N-Word. Now this is probably only going to stop a tiny handful of Black folks from using the word, and frankly, those of us that are enlightened and intelligent enough to know that the word is a filthy, self loathing, shameful, pathetic, flaming hot brand on the spirit of our race... we've already buried it years ago.
But then you'll still have far far too many young Blacks that aren't smart or strong enough to eliminate the word from their vocabulary and mindset.
I was completely disgusted at the "Racsim & The N Word" forum a few days after the 'funeral' when rapper Da'Brat decided to argue down Dr. Cornell West over her usage and the rap industry's acceptance, need and embracing of the N word. She declared that when Blacks use the word, its softened and warmed up by spelling it Nigga (with an A) and not Nigger (with an ER). Personally, I'm so sick and tired of that lame justification for not having the intelligence or internal fortitude to change your attitude and mindset. It's pathetic!
To be honest, burying the N-word was cute... but what we need to do as a race, especially with certain members of Our Race, is eliminate the N - Mentality. The N Mindset! That is where the Real harm lies - in those men and women who are ego driven and only think of themselves. Who don't care about their children, their parents, or their very own legacy. Those men and women, who care nothing of law and order, nothing about respect for others, older people, younger people - no one! Those thugs and hoodlums who live only to steal, shoot, rob and kill. That N-Mindset is what we have to eliminate in our communities. That is the REAL problem!
I really say this today because a few days ago I went back to my hometown of Baltimore for a wedding. My poor town has truly fallen into a violent, poorly managed, poorly educated, drug haven of a city. It makes me sad. Anyway... I found myself heading west down a large street and I could hear what sounded like a lawnmower in the distance. The only problem was that it was getting louder very quickly as I approached a green light at a fairly busy intersection. When I was about 30 feet from the intersection, this man... a Black guy in his 20's or 30's wearing the standard issued white tank-top... came flying through the intersection on this huge ATV causing several cars to slam on their brakes. First - he ran a red light, Second - ATV's are against the law on Baltimore streets, Third - the intersection was very busy, and Fourth - I don't think he even slowed down to try and avoid causing an accident. It is this kind of ignorant, thoughtless, thugish, primative, egotistic behavior that makes the N-Mindset far worse than the N-Word alone. We have to get rid of both and we have to do it now and we have to use any means at our disposal. These fools are destroying our heritage, our ancestors legacy, our children's future and our current integrity.
A child asked, What is a nigger?
Dr. Cornel West replied, "He's a human being who is scared and without dignity."
And I agree.
TTBM
18 comments:
Yeah, the mentality is appalling......to you and I, and those like us.
But --> they --> don't see it that way. --> They --> probably think our mentality is appalling.
Who's right?
How do you convince someone that their way of life pales in comparison to yours? That their way of life is destructive to others. Could --> they --> think our way of life is destructive to them and theirs? Maybe it is.
So who's right?
I mean, I know AND get what you're saying. I happen to agree. But I've learned that in order to influence someone to change their way of doing business, you can't just tell them they are wrong. You can't just say you are right. You have to acknowledge their side, admit that it exists and is valid. Or else --> they --> will never hear us. Especially if our "help" or remedy is unsolicited.
Thats where I think a lot of leadership efforts fall short.
I agree with your post. I'm tired of these clowns who have no respect for anyone's livelihood...especially their own.
BTW: My blog went private...if you're interested in being added to the readers' list, send me an e-mail (it's in my Blogger profile).
To a man only looking inside from the outside I have to say that I agree with you as far as our children not knowing the harm they are causing by perpetuating the mistakes that we have made. The problem I see is that all children emulate their elders and change doesn't need to start with the children of today. The children of today need new role models. If we want them to change it must begin with us. Everyones life is altered by different circumstances however civility and morality can and should be part of every human being no matter where they stand. Once parents begin teaching their children by doing, perhaps then a change can begin.
DS
Wow, i am just grateful and thankful that you thought my blog worthy of mentioning...but i do abide by what i said and what you wrote...to write for yourself. As far as the N-word goes, i agree, it's not the word but the acts...so i say while we are burying words, lets bury HOE, and BITCH TOO! Cuz, i see far too many of our young, trying to emulate and become that which they are not!
Hi there B. GOOD -
I agree 100%. You are so right, you HAVE to acknowledge a persons mindset and find a way to show them both the consequences and the options available to them.
I personally ran into this as a problem about 10 years ago when I had a big blow up with my youngest brother who had started living this lifestyle that I felt was detrimental to him, my parents, and our community as a whole. He had adopted this very thuggish, law-breaking, substance abusing [liquor] lifestyle and I tried to get him to see that he was killing himself. Honestly, I wasn't up for the task. I can be pretty jugdemental sometimes - SURPRISE :) and I just went about things the wrong way and he and I almost came to blows after a heated argument... so I agree that a certain amount of ACKNOWLEDGEMENT is a must.
Hi GOLDEN SILENCE -
Thanks for your comment!
I does get annoying doesn't it. Sometimes I just sit back in awe of the amount of energy it must take to TRY and be disrespectful! I know for some it comes natural, but I'm sure a good portion of folks have to actuallt take a moment to think of what they can do next.
Hello DEATHSWEEP! How are you?
Thanks for your comment! I'm with you all the way! Adults HAVE to step up EARLY in a childs life to start teaching him or her - right from wrong, good from bad, truth from lies, self respect and respect for others. Sadly, in large parts of our community - the nuclear family has all but disappeared and large numbers of children are growing up with only one parent, OR you have young single moms having multiple babies that she will struggle to raise, and I mean raise in the simplest form of the word - feed, clothe, and provide a bed. There's hardly the time or ability to pay these children the extra attention they need to proper and grow the way they deserve. Now, I must point out that this situation is exacerbated by the insane number of men of color who refuse to step up and be TRULY accountable for the children they create!
But you are right, my friend, it starts with establishing the right mindset in our kids at the very onset of life!
Hi there MIZREPRESENT! Yeah, YOUR blog is something very special indeed! Classy, cool, inspiring...
I too, hope that H-- and B---- are laying on their death beds on our community as well. The self hate in so many parts of our community is absolutely stunning! I doubt if there is another race / group of people in the world that subjects itself en masse to the hate and violence that the African American community does.
Hi there B. GOOD -
I agree 100%. You are so right, you HAVE to acknowledge a persons mindset and find a way to show them both the consequences and the options available to them.
I personally ran into this as a problem about 10 years ago when I had a big blow up with my youngest brother who had started living this lifestyle that I felt was detrimental to him, my parents, and our community as a whole. He had adopted this very thuggish, law-breaking, substance abusing [liquor] lifestyle and I tried to get him to see that he was killing himself. Honestly, I wasn't up for the task. I can be pretty jugdemental sometimes - SURPRISE :) and I just went about things the wrong way and he and I almost came to blows after a heated argument... so I agree that a certain amount of ACKNOWLEDGEMENT is a must.
Hi GOLDEN SILENCE -
Thanks for your comment!
I does get annoying doesn't it. Sometimes I just sit back in awe of the amount of energy it must take to TRY and be disrespectful! I know for some it comes natural, but I'm sure a good portion of folks have to actuallt take a moment to think of what they can do next.
Hello DEATHSWEEP! How are you?
Thanks for your comment! I'm with you all the way! Adults HAVE to step up EARLY in a childs life to start teaching him or her - right from wrong, good from bad, truth from lies, self respect and respect for others. Sadly, in large parts of our community - the nuclear family has all but disappeared and large numbers of children are growing up with only one parent, OR you have young single moms having multiple babies that she will struggle to raise, and I mean raise in the simplest form of the word - feed, clothe, and provide a bed. There's hardly the time or ability to pay these children the extra attention they need to proper and grow the way they deserve. Now, I must point out that this situation is exacerbated by the insane number of men of color who refuse to step up and be TRULY accountable for the children they create!
But you are right, my friend, it starts with establishing the right mindset in our kids at the very onset of life!
Hi there MIZREPRESENT! Yeah, YOUR blog is something very special indeed! Classy, cool, inspiring...
I too, hope that H-- and B---- are laying on their death beds on our community as well. The self hate in so many parts of our community is absolutely stunning! I doubt if there is another race / group of people in the world that subjects itself en masse to the hate and violence that the African American community does.
It's saddening and frightening really that people actually believe that the symbolic burial of a hateful word is all that's needed to repair our community. I see the N mindset every day, not only in the streets like the example you mentioned, but also in the corporate arena on a different scale.
Great post and congrats on all the blog hits!
Hey TTBM! I enjoy reading your blog so much. Keep up the good work. And keep writing for yourself. I have a sneaky suspicion that when you write for yourself, you are still writing for us.
Angie
http://www.nuvisionforanuday.blogspot.com
As always, my brother, you are right on the mark.
It is funny, but I posted on simlar themes twice in the past three days.
All we can do is to continue to represent the best that we, as a people, have to offer. We can and must lead by example.
GF
The mindset is always the most difficult change to make. I means changing your inner-self. And that can be most difficult when one has been the same for so long. I do belive in this case, it is of utmost importance that black people get away from N-word. It is self degrading and ugly. But most of all it is just sad.
Well said TBM. Yes, we need to get away from the word, but we most urgently need to get away from the "MINDSET", the Ghettoized, Thug Life, Gangsta, Pimp mentality.
Many a pure blogging heart has probably been corrupted by the pressure of writing solely to preserve a readership...good for you for staying true to yourself and writing what's in your heart. That's what is most attractive anyway.
TTBM...
I absolutely agree. Having a symbolic "funeral" for a word is not a panacea for what troubles black folks in this country. On one side, we have those of us who see and want a better standard of life...and are willing to do the hard work to make it happen. On the other side...are those scared persons who aren't brave enough to do something...think they are owed something...blame others for their inadequacies..and mock those of us who want better.
I want to know how you feel about this guy using n-word so freely on his blog.
Dude,
I need to get in touch with you... email me, please!
I just heard about this not stopping for red lights phenomenon last night, but the fellow told me he witnessed it in St Louis, so naturally I thought it was a jacked-up Southern/Midwestern thang. I am truly sad to see it appear here on the Eastern Seaboard.
I have found Baltimore to be a facinating city, ever since I headed up a research project about its Black community. I just wish that its government and citizenry would get their acts together and bring the city back to the magnificence it once had!
L
There is a huge problem if Da Brat thinks she can mentally spar with Cornell West. I agree those of us that are more enlightened buried the N word many years ago. The sad part about it all is that the people that this needs to touch will never see it.
My father taught me that N word meant ignorant, boorish, and ill bred; ever since that has been my impression of the word. Everyone who uses the word is ignorant, boorish, and ill bred, in my opinion. There is no reason for our community to recognize the word on any level, i do not care if your friend since pre-school calls you the n word do not look in their direction unless you are ignorant, boorish, and ill bred. Do not buy the music that contains the word unless you are ignorant, boorish, and ill bred, just like the artists, which use the word. I am so tired of people being paid for humiliating and degrading our race! We have the power to end this NOW! Stop buying the records, going to the movies, watching the shows, etc. that use the n-word. Now if you are ignorant, boorish, and ill bred then by all means continue to do your thing, but please stop calling yourself an African American, Black, or Colored...just join the KKK!
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