Christmas in the BLOGOSPHERE!

It's 2:12AM Christmas moring...

Gifts and toys are under the tree and the 9 year old in me is breakin' all the rules... I'm staying up!

No I'm not looking for the fat man...

I'm givin' a shout out to everyone that has made my blog one of my 2006 highlights! My blog has amazed me with the number of people that take the time to read my thoughts and opinions and leave comments, thoughts and opinions of their own! The kinds of interractions I've seen on this blog are humbling and amazing. I've had folks agree with me, challenge me, disagree with me and just plain keep on top of me and I want to thank you all and I want to wish all of you the best Christmas, Kwanzaa, Hanukkah, Festivus - whatever it is you celebrate in late December.

I want to send out a special end of year wish to some of my cyber-friends that bless and honor me with their frequent visits, comments and thoughts on my blog! Please forgive me if I accidentally left your name off, I've been putting toys together and my brain is a little fried!!!

-Gunfighter
-Anali
-DJ Black Adam
-Tasha
-Golden Silence
-Creole in DC
-Native Son
-Seaniemo
-TDJ
-Heavenly Zeta
-Evia
-Clare
-Notta Golddigger
-JAC
-Curious
-JJ
-KJ
-Da Rattler
-DATMF
-Charlie Mack's Granddaughter
-Mad Cabbie
-Tickled Pinkies
-Elizabeth
-MMAFAN
-K Dad
-Oface
-I am not Starr Jones
-MsDee
-Coco Stasia

...And all the countless "ANONYMOUS" commenters.

Merry Christmas and my best wishes to you and your families in the year to come!

...and a blogger shall lead them.

-The Thinking Black Man

Cellular Annoyance!!!

Few things bother me as much as rude fools on their cell phones.

I took a final exam today in a controlled test room. On the door was a big sign that read "TURN OFF YOUR CELL PHONE" then inside the door was big sign that read "TURN OFF YOUR CELL PHONE." Then the woman that was at the sign in desk asked, "Do you have a cell phone? If you do, please turn it off now." Along the walls there were numerous signs with big pictures of cell phones that read, "EXAM ROOM - ALL CELLULAR PHONES MUST BE TURNED OFF."

Okay, so an hour later I'm calculating the difference between FIFO and LIFO inventory management when... A FREAKIN' CELL PHONE STARTS RINGING!!!! And not just ringing, but blasting some vulgar rap song! The rude fool that didn't follow the easiest directions in the world had the nerve to take her time turning it off! How rude and stupid and thoughtless do you have to be to NOT turn off your cell phone in a TESTING ROOM. I can't even accept that she forgot about it. Like so many rude fools I come across on the subway and in the streets, that cell phone means more to her than respecting the people around her.

These ignorant people absolutely kill me. I have heard some of the most vulgar and insane conversations being shouted into cellphones on the subway, and in stores.

• I've heard guys running down what they did and were gonna' do to women in the bedroom;
• I've heard a mother cursing her lawyer out for not getting her child support payments reduced;
• I've heard countless people carrying on the loudest conversations about absolutely nothing on their darn cell phones;
• I've heard losers rehearsing their vulgar rap lyrics into their cellphones;
• I was almost run over in a crosswalk by some dumb woman trying to talk on her cellphone with one hand while barely turning her stiring wheel with the other;
• I was nearly run off the road a few weeks ago by a thoughtless clown running his lips on his cell phone on I-95.

Basically I'm fed up with this creepy love of the cell phone that so many people are showing! Folks walking around all day with these big wireless ear pieces on with the blinking lights looking like the freakin' Borg. It's all insanity to me!

I'm not knocking cell phones themselves - I think they are incredible devices and they make life very convenient. But the insane addiction that so many people have towards them gives me the willies. Some folks can't stand to be more than a few seconds away from that first ring; some folks can't exist for more than a few minutes before having to yack on the phone with ANYONE about the first little flicker of thought that enters their little pea brains; and some folks CAN'T EVEN TURN THEIR PHONE OFF FOR THREE HOURS IN A SILENT EXAM ROOM WITH 20 SIGNS THAT TELL THEM TO CUT THEM OFF!!!

AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!

Can anyone explain "Declining Balance Depreciation" in 30 words or less? Nevermind...

TTBM

Jumping the gun with Steve Jett (no pun intended)

When I was a kid, I had this little wooden jig-saw puzzle map of the United States. I loved that thing. I think that's why US geography always came easy to me. I remember that Idaho was a fat yellow 'L' shaped state that went in fourth, after I put in Washington, Oregon and California. Now, while I knew where the state went in relations to the other 49, I had no real idea of the cities and towns that made up the fat 'L' shaped state. So when I heard about a town called Greenleaf considering a unique gun ordinance, my first question was "Where in the hell is Greenleaf?" That question stood out so much with me that I ended up using it as a title in my blog posting about the creator of this 'ordinance', a councilman named Steve Jett.

The article I read was compressed from several east coast newspapers and a news website. It implied that this Steve Jett fellow was implying that hurricane Katrina refugees or refugees like them could end up in the small town of Greenleaf and he was suggesting that townsfolk arm themselves against the impending crimewave that would insue. I think if anyone could have seen me when I first heard this on the radio and THEN read it in print - they would pobably think I was about to blow an artery. I was livid, to put it mildly.

So, I started blogging. Basically I tore this Steve Jett a new one.

Then I noticed a comment on my posting, actually two comments, several weeks later. This person identified themselves as a Greenleaf citizen and they told me that the story I heard/read had been spun out of context and they suggested I do more research. I agreed.

In my posting, I called Steve Jett an asshole. Actually to be perfectly correct I called him a 'Racist Asshole.' To me, those are two significant words to call someone and at the time I felt I was justified. At the time I thought this guy was using race and fear to stir up his town. I have since found that the articles I encountered were spun a fair amount. So basically, I now believe that I was wrong about Steve Jett. From my newest research I have concluded that Steve Jett is neither racist OR an asshole.

In a nutshell, the basis for Steve Jett's gun ordinance suggestion, which was part of a larger community ordinance, called for citizens to consider [CONSIDER] arming themselves to be prepared to protect their homes from possible spill-over crime from larger cities in the region - NOT from possible hurricane Katrina victims! Greenleaf is a small town with less than 900 people, no reported crime, and practically no police force. Personally, I agree with what he is saying. I agree with it and I do it myself. I have been the first-hand victim of spill-over crime from people that came from DC to my neighborhood to steal from me, and I have quite a "welcome" for anyone foolish enough to break into my home while I am there. So, I was wrong to call Steve Jett a racist asshole for what he is trying to do.

I know that most blogs are just opinions and rolling conversations, I consider mine to be just that. If I was talking to someone or sharing my opinion face to face with anyone that was kind enough to listen [or read, in this case] and I said something that was wrong or improper to them or about them, I was raised by my parents to be the type of man to apologize - so, I apologize to Steve Jett for calling him a racist and an asshole. I'm sure he'll personally never read this blog, so my apology may just go out into the cybersphere, and that is fine with me. I believe the universe tends to unfold as it should, so I have sent my karma out to wherever it is supposed to be.

PS. I still don't agree with Mr. Jett's claims to be using the second amendment to the Constitution in his ordinance, but a lot of folks make this claim and I happen to disagree with them all.

TTBM

When is enough sh-t, enough?

The kid next door is yellin' at his mom again, so it's either time to blog or time to go over there and whup his ass. Since his mom would probably have me locked up for the latter, I'll try the former.

Every few weeks I can hear the 20 year old boy next door yelling at his mother. Yes he's 20 and yes he's a BOY. He's an asshole actually [ I don't want to give 'boys' a bad name] and I think he's got some wires crossed in his head. Outside the house, he's mild mannered and quiet, soft spoken and polite. You'd think he takes his halo home each night and polishes it up before saying his prayers and taking his vitamins. But when he gets angry, he lays into his mother with a profanity laden diatribe that makes my eyebrows raise! I don't think he has a chemical imbalance or anything, I just think that he knows he's a little runt of a punk and if he talked to anybody in the street like that, they'd whip his little ass and stuff him into his own pants pocket. But he knows that his mother baby's him, she coddles him, she allows him to treat her like shit and she is not strong enough or willing to kick his triflin', disrespectful, loser ass out into the street.

The way he treats her always brings me to a question that I always find myself asking:
"When is enough shit, enough?"

To hear this woman talk about her son, you'd think he was a fine young man, but she is clearly in a massive state of denial.

Here's another situation that had me asking myself this question: I found myself in a hospital lobby a few weeks ago. There was a woman in her late 30's there with her mother who was about 60 years old. The younger woman walked over to her mother and said, "Give me $5.00 so I can go get some fries from downstairs." The mother quickly pulled out a handful of bills and gave her daughter a five and then peeled off a second five. The daughter rejected the second five and said [with some attitude] "Why you givin' me $10? All I'm gettin' is some fries!" The mother said, "Well, I need you to bring me something to drink. All I can have is diet Pespi." The daughter seemed very irritated and said, "Shoot, five is enough for fries and a soda. Stuff downstairs ain't that expensive!" She walked away.

Ten minutes later the daughter came back with a chicken fingers platter with fries and a clear colored soda. The mother shot me a quick embarrased look and asked her daughter, "Where's my diet Pespi?" The daughter sat down and started shaking her catsup packet and replied dismissively, "I changed my mind when I got down there and I wanted some chicken and a Sprite, so I didn't have enough to get your soda." The mother shrugged and shook her head sheepishly. She glanced back towards me helpless and embarrased. I swear to God, this is exactly how this went down with NO exaggerations!!!

Now, in my book, any number of things could have caused the daughter not to have any cash on her, but to straight up diss her mother like this! To just shit all over her mother like this! I got the strangest feeling that this assinine treatment was nothing new from her.

Again I ask...
"When is enough shit, enough?"

Then there was the woman I was talking to who had once dated a guy, and they decided to play house and they bought a home together and then they had a kid. Of course, hardly anyone gets married these days, and these two were no different - they'll share a mortgage and bring a life into the world but far be it for them to try and make a commitment to each other. Anyway...

Homeboy turns straight punk after a year or so and he bails out on the woman I was talking to. No child support, no financial support for the house-hold, nothing. So the woman is damned near homeless and penniless for a long time before she gets herself together, but she refuses to take him to court for child support. So, a few years go by and she's doing better, but her Grandmother is now on her death bed. She manages to balance her day between being at her Grandmothers bedside, being at her job and being a mother. Then Homeboy's mother becomes ill at the same time and mind you, he's still dissin' her and their kid, but this woman goes to be with him at his mothers bedside. So she's now spending everyday driving all over creation to run from one hospital to the next and then to work and then to daycare and then home. She's standing beside this guy despite how cold he's treated her. Then when her Grandmother dies, this asshole doesn't even have the decency to show up at the funeral - if not for her grandmother, then at least to show his appreciation for her stading by his sick mother. But she still finds a way to defend this clown to people.

Can someone tell me...
"When is enough shit, enough?"

I mean, when do you say to yourself, "I've allowed this person to treat me so bad that I can't look myself in the mirror. I have thrown away all of my self-respect because I continue to allow this person to treat me like I'm worthless." When do you say, "I have more value than this!"

I understand that some things just aren't for me to understand. I accept that the things that make me tick, don't make everyone else tick the same way, but at some point damn-it, isn't enough, enough?

TTBM

Greenleaf is five miles from Caldwell! And now you know too...

A few days ago in the town of Greenleaf, Idaho - the city passed Ordinance #208, which was basically called "Greenleaf's Gun Ownership Ordinance."

Basically, it requested (but did not require) that all residents keep a gun in their homes for protection and to deter crime.

Personally, I don't have any issues with law abiding citizens owning guns to protect themselves and deter crime, especially in their homes. I don't even have an issue with city ordiances requesting this. I hate criminals with a passion and if more people had guns IN THEIR HOMES, I think many hoodlums and thugs would think twice before breaking and entering.

My issue with the Greenleaf situation is that after seeing the chaos of Hurricane Katrina, a city councilor in this tiny Idaho town founded by pacifist Quakers came up with what he considered a novel idea. He wanted Greenleaf residents to keep a gun at home in case they were overrun by refugees from the Gulf Coast.

"This is not an 'it'll never happen here kind of thing,'" said Steven Jett, the ordinance's sponsor. "We could get refugees." This is actually what he said!

The actual ordinance reads.
“In order to provide for the emergency management of the city, and further in order to provide for and protect the safety, security and general welfare of the city and its inhabitants, it is recommended that every head of household residing in the city limits maintain a firearm, together with ammunition therefore, and obtain appropriate training relating to proper, safe and lawful handling of firearms.”

Okay, it's a gun ordinance. But I hate the fact that this asshole Steven Jett is trying to use racism and racial ignorance to promote this plan. If you want your folks to buy guns because you're an NRA patsy, then go ahead and push the guns. But, damnit don't try to stir up an unreasonable fear of black people within your white community! By far, the face of the Katrina evacuees where black. What this asshole Jett is saying is... "White folks of Greenleaf, be scared! Be scared because BLACK PEOPLE might come to our town! Whoooooo! Whooooooo! Be afraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaid! Whooooooo!"

What an asshole.

Now, I try to be the first person to call a duck a duck. And, I've heard the stories, I've read the reports - there are large numbers of criminals that have been relocated from New Orleans and lots of these hoodlums have be relocated around the country and started doing the shit that got them locked down in the first place - and I FIRMLY believe these people should be taken off the streets and put behind bars accordingly. But, for Idaho's Steven Jett to try and paint all Katrina evacuees as criminal, it is absolutely, racist and it is absolutely criminal.

And since I'm calling Steven Jett an asshole here, I'd like to comment on all assholes that misuse the US Constitution...

"Steven Jett, the sponsor of the proposal wrote, 'I am the city councilman that has proposed the ordinance in Greenleaf, Idaho. You would agree that this is not a new idea. The 2nd amendment was ratified 215 years ago (12/15/1791). I am only supporting it.' "

The 2nd amendment reads:
"A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed."

So many assholes cut and chop this sentence up to use it towards their own end. Steven Jett is no different. He's trying to justify the "right of the people to keep and bear arms..." Personally, I think owning a gun is fine if it is legally purchased and registered and the owner is a law abiding citizen with proper mental faculties. But I do not believe that the 2nd amendment is a cart blanche allowance for everyone to have a gun. If you read the text itself, it is clear that it was written to assure that the 18th century American militia was well armed and ready to stand in armed defense of the United States. Well, in today's United States we have an Army, a Navy, an Air Force, and the best damned fighters in THE WORLD - THE UNITED STATES MARINES to protect our homeland. The whole militia thing isn't quite what it used to be. But folks still try to use the 2nd amendment to serve their own purposes. Just read people! Read and use your heads!

TTBM

A Message to Joe Gibbs

Dear Joe,

It's time to play Jason Campbell.

It's time to play Jason Campbell.
Sure, we all love you and respect you from our glory days. Your legend here in DC will live for generations. But now, Mr. Gibbs, you are killing us. You and Mark Brunell are killing us with your ineffective gameplay. He is slow and jittery and passes like a little girl. You, sir, seem to be in another world - shrugging your shoulders and scratching your head like you can't figure out what is going on.

It's time to play Jason Campbell.
See, at this point, nobody takes the Redskins seriously. You have a slow and immobile quarterback who cannot and will not run the ball. In the modern NFL you have fast QB's like Mike Vick and Steve McNair and you have big strong QB's like Culpepper, Peyton Manning, Brian Leftwich and then you have QB's that can really throw like Fauvre, Brees, McNabb, Manning, and Brady. These kinds of QB's keep defenses on their toes, because you have to be prepared for anything. A deep pass, a run, a screen, ascramble, a short pass, anything. Mark Brunell [God Bless him] he just doesn't bring the depth and the talent and the threat that you need to keep opponents on their heels. And, now Portis is out! You need to bench Brunell.

It's time to play Jason Campbell.
Lord, Joe! You traded three draft picks to get this Campbell kid. And now you won't play him!?!?! We all are wondering if you've lost your mind. You sell all your stocks to by a Porsche and yet you leave it in the garage so you can go tooling around town in your '81 LeBaron. You can no longer say that he isn't ready to play yet, the ONLY WAY HE WILL GET READY IS IF YOU PLAY HIM!!! If he is awful, it will show, but he can only get better. This guy is not fine wine Joe, he does NOT get better sitting in your basement aging. He needs to be on the field.

It's time to play Jason Campbell.
Frankly Joe, we all like loyalty. But this "Love Fest" you have going on with Mark Brunell is a smack in the face to all of us fans who cheer for the Redskins each week, EACH SEASON!!! We bleed burgundy and gold for God's sake!!! The Redskins ARE NOT YOURS!!! They are ours Joe! They are ours! They belong to the fans! You coaches come and go, the players come and go! But us fans - we stay forever! So, I don't care what you and Mark have to prove to each other. I don't know if you have seen one too many Hollywood movies where the old fart comes in and saves the day. But that is not for you and Mark to try and prove to each other! That is not fair to us fans! Your stubborness and almost flippant attitude towards benching Brunell are almost criminal. You owe the fans a winning team. You are slapping us fans and the rest of the Redskin players right in the face by refusing to put the best team possible on the field each Sunday.

Joe, I love you - But I'm afraid this game may have passed you and Brunell by. It is time play step aside and play Jason Campbell.

Signed-
ALL THE DAMN REDSKIN FANS!!!!

Angry Dad...

Today I am still, The Angry Dad.

Yesterday, my four year old son was at a Chuck-E-Cheese birthday party for one of his little friends. I didn't go, but when my wife got back, my son had some scratches on his face that he didn't have when he left for the party.

According to my wife, while my son was playing up in these 'tubes' they have running along the walls and ceiling for the kids climb, play and slide in, he got into a scuffle with another little boy. Another little Black kid, just like himself.

When the two of them came out of the 'tubes' my son was in tears, he had fresh bleeding scratches and the other kid had a busted lip. My wife didn't know what had happened, but like the leveled headed, intelligent woman that she is she didn't point fingers or make a scene. She called for the other boys mother and proceeded to tell both of them that fighting is not how you settle your problems. The first to show up for the other boy was [probably] his grandmother and then some very young looking 20 something woman assuming the role of his mother. My wife tried to explain what happened from her perspecive and tried to determine if apologies [from either side] were needed and to just get something by way of response from the other mother. The woman looked her kid over, said some things to the grandmother lady and flat ignored my wife and child. When I say IGNORED, I mean did not say a word or anything, she just took her kid and walked away. My wife was dumbfounded.

I wish I was there to comfort my son. I'm sure my wife did a fine job, but I would have liked to have been there too. Actually I probably would have done more harm than good and while I'd like to think I would have stressed to both boys that fighting is not something they should have done, I think I would have gone to jail for the verbal assault upon the other kids mother. I mean, how fuckin' triflin' is a mother who refuses to even acknowledge the child or the MOTHER of the child that just got into a fight with her child. How ghetto could this trick really be. What kind of mother is she? She is the ignorant, flippant, arrogant type of mother that far too many young children have. I am quite certain that I would not have allowed her to just walk away from me. That's not a knock on my wife, but I'm certain that I would have given this woman a significant piece of my mind. She inturn would have probably cursed me out and I would have finished her off with a precision onslaught of verbal declarations and assumptions about her, her family, her family's pets, her hygene and her sexual habits. As I said, I may have caused more harm than good by being there.

A few things about this incident really stung me. ONE, my son has this wide-eyed innocence about him. He thinks that everyone is his friend and everyone wants to play with him and all kids like to be nice to each other. This incident has proven to him that this simply isn't true. TWO, I couldn't help but think about a conversation I had with my father years ago. He told me that he could not understand why it seemed that young Black kids had such a high propensity to fight each other. He said that when you put large numbers of White kids together or Asian kids or Spanish kids, you don't see the same volume of little kids calling each other names and fighting each other. I've never scientifically looked at this phenomenon - but on the surface, I tend to agree with my dad. My opinions are formed by the conversations I hear and see in public, the things I've encountered at playgrounds and things I've been exposed to in general. My father's words came back to me significantly with this incident yesterday.

I stressed to my son yesterday, that fighting is not the way boys and men should settle their differences. I also told him that some kids are just not friendly and some kids don't like to play fair. I told him that I wish I was there for him when this happened. And then I told him words that I was told a hundred times and only violated once [okay, twice] - "Don't throw the first punch, but if somebody hits you first, then do what you have to do to protect yourself." I really wish I didn't have to tell him this at this point, but that really wasn't up to me.

-I'm still angry, though.

TABM

Election Day blues...

Okay, it's late afternoon on election day.

The news is full of nothing substaintial. A lot of election day fluff and expert interviews that all end in... "well we'll just have to wait a see..." I just want to yell - "So what the HELL are YOU being interviewed for?"

Two things have my blood pressure up though-

The first is: there have been large numbers of election flyers being distributed in black communities with a "Ehrlich - Steele, Democtratic Voting Guide" title line. The cover of the flyer has pictures of three Black men on it including Democratic Maryland congressman Kweisi Mfume, Wayne Curry and Prince George's County executive Jack Johnson. For the record none of these three men endorse the current Republican Governor Bob Ehrlich. Yet, on the inside of the flyer where the candidates are listed - the Republican Governor is listed as the top candidate along with Michael Steele the Republican Senate candidate.

On top of that, the people handing these flyers out we're homeless people from Philadelphia that were bused in solely because they didn't know who was who in our election. And according to then, this was the only chance for food and money that they had.

From the Bob Ehrlich camp, they admitted that they had paid for and provided these flyers, "but it was not an attempt to confuse voters."

Uh... BULLSHIT!

This is a sad and shameless attempt to trick voters that may not be paying as much attention as they should. Now I have to say - that anyone who is not mentally sound enough to know who's a Republican and who's a Democrat, and they're not able to read a flyer to see who's who, then frankly, I really don't want them voting. Yeah I know some folks will figure it's cute when a 93 year old blind grandmother still gets out to the polls to vote like she did 20 years ago and she refuses to let anybody read the ballot to her... but come on! Regardless of how I feel about the voting process, some people are going to be deceived and some are going to hurt the future of our state and nation.

I still think Bob Ehrlich is the lesser or two evils for Maryland's Governor, but he is a low down dirty dog... wait wait... I like dogs - he is a low down dirty bastard for pulling a stunt like this! Shame on him!

The second thing that is bothering me today is: The black vote and Michael Steele. From media estimates, there are a lot of Black people voting along color lines. I as a Black man am 100% ashamed of these ignorant people.

If you are Black and you vote for Steele because you like his policies, or you like George Bush, or you are against embryonic stem cell research, or you want to stay the course in Iraq. Then fine. Those are real issues and that's what elections are all about. You're an asshole - but at least you are voting the issues. So I can't fault you.

But, if you look at his face and say, "I'm voting for him because he's Black and I'm Black." and you don't know his politics, or you don't know his history, then you are absolutely worthless as a human being. You are a sellout, you are a fool, you are not worthy of the time it would take to have your ass kicked.

All I can say is...

BLACK FOLKS:

please, please, please

DO NOT VOTE FOR MICHAEL STEELE JUST BECAUSE HE IS BLACK!

And, please, please, please - PLEASE...

Give a damn.

TTBM

It started with puppies and ended with Multiple Sclerosis

With election day less than 72 hours away. I found myself turning an ever increasing deaf ear to the political ads squeezed in between my favorite television shows. It was my ignoring ear that heard a certain silence in an ad that actually caught my attention.

Let me back up for a second to explain why I heard that silence.

About four months ago I first saw a TV ad with Michael Steele on it. He started out by warning us that "The Washington set" was about to start a series of dark and frightening ad's, demonizing him and accusing him of everything under the sun, including hating puppies. He proceeded to touch on a few political points and then pulled a puppy from off camera and rubbed it under the chin and said, "For the record. I like puppies." I thought that was amusing.

Then over the next few days I started noticing people, Black People, asking each other, "Are you voting for Michael Steele?" Before long the question came around to me and I asked, "Why in the world do you think I'd vote for Michael Steele?" People would then kinda' bob and weave a little and I follow up with, "Because he's Black?" They'd shuffle a little and answer, "Yeah, I was just wondering."

I then proceeded to tell everyone almost the same answer, verbatim. "There is no way in the world that I would vote for someone just because our skin was the same color! And, there is no way - at this point in history that I would play a part in giving a Republican a seat in the Senate or the House. I want Democrats to take over the Congress and hold hearings that will hold President George Bush 100% accountable for the illegal and unjustified invasion of Iraq, The unnecessary deaths and injuries to thousands and tens of thousands of American Servicemen and women, The unnecessary deaths of hundreds of thousands of dead and injured Iraqis, The privatization and for-profit contracting of services performed in the Iraq Theater of Operations, and the lack of support in the hunt for Osama bin Laden!" So Hell no, I ain't voting for Michael Steele! At this point in my answer my face would ususally be red and I'd be scowling!

So that is where I stand on Mike Steele. He's a Bush Republican, Republicans tend to give less than a damn about minorities, middle class and lower income families. I believe that Republicans have arrogantly stolen the concept of moral decency and claimed it as solely their domain and told America that you are either moral and with us or immoral and against us - there is no middle ground and only we are civil and just. Of course those Republicans that have recently been accused of paying off abused mistresses; or tax evasion; or flirting with pedophillia; or stealing; or having methamphetimene fueled gay sex with a prostitute. Should simply be ignored and not factored into the GOP's principles - yet when Bill Clinton foolishly got a blowjob in the oval office, Republicans labeled the whole party as horny and immoral. These people have got to be kidding!

Am I voting for Michael Steele? Am I voting for a Republican? Am I voting for a Black Republican? Am I voting to help give George W. Bush a free pass on accountability?

To steal a quote from Senator Clay Davis on HBO's "The Wire"

SHHHHHHHHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTT! No.

Well, back to the silence I heard.

This past week I started seeing commericals featuring Mike Steele's sister, Dr. Monica Turner. She started her ads by saying, "Congressman Ben Cardin is attacking Michael Steele with deceptive, tasteless ads," speaking about recent Democratic ads featuring Michael J. Fox and the need to have Ben Carin in the Senate to help Democrats push through federal funding for Embryonic stem cell research. As everyone knows, Fox has Parkinson's disease and his muscle spasms are clear in the ad. She goes on specifically to say Cardin "is using the victim of a terrible disease to frighten people all for his own political gain."

She goes on for a few more seconds before closing with this statement about Michael Steele "He does support stem cell research, and he cares deeply for those who suffer from disease. How do I know? I'm Michael Steele's little sister. I have MS, and I know he cares about me."

When I heard this I nearly fell out of my seat! Isn't Michael Steele doing the same thing he's accusing Cardin of doing. Isn't he using M.S. to frighten people in the same political vein that Cardin used Parkinson's? Isn't there the same amount of logic AND shamelessness in both ad's?

Well, last night as Dr. Turner was interrupting a new episode of Divorce Court, I noticed that Dr. Turner's ad ended a few words shorter than normal. She said, "How do I know? I'm Michael Steele's little sister." PERIOD! CUT! END! STOP! after over a week of this ad running, I think someone in Steele's camp realized that they looked just as pitiful as his opponent. Either way - it doesn't matter. I think folks have already made up their minds. I can only hope and pray that no matter how people vote, they vote THE ISSUES and they vote THEIR CONSCIENCE. With a large Black democratic group in Prince George's county throwing their public endorsement to Steele. I find myself worried and disheartened. I'm afraid that many Blacks are going to side with Steele because of his color. If this is the case, then their decision will be a slap in the face of all the men and women who sacrificed their lives so that we could be afforded the right to vote.

I'm going to end this post with one of my favorite quotes from an anti-Steele ad:

"Michael Steele likes puppies, but he loves George Bush!"
Think people, before you vote on Tuesday. It's not about Black or White, it's about good and bad, right and wrong.

TVBM

Observations and rhinestones...

I saw something on the subway last night that made me want to run to my blog!

It wasn't the first time I saw it, but it was just the wrong thing at the wrong time at the wrong moment.

Ladies, ladies, ladies...
If you are a mature and grown woman, please do not come out in public with words like:

"Diva"
"Cutie"
"Sexy"
"Hottie"
"Sugar"
and/or
"Girl"

embroidered in rhinestones and glitter on the seat of your pants!!!!

It looks like a sizzlin'-hot-ghetto-mess when you do. I just want to tell you what your friends and family are too scared to say.

Let's have just a tiny bit of decorum here, can we?

Just for the record, there is not a TRUE Diva in the free world that would be caught dead with the word "DIVA" sewn to her ass in bright red sequins!!! So, please find it in your heart to believe that if you are a real hottie, cutie, sexy sugar or diva - WE WILL SEE IT IN HOW YOU CARRY YOURSELF and not in the billboard you have turned your backside into!

TTBM

Nothing is more Un-American than ELECTION TIME!!!

"Fogarty watched a naked young stripper do the splits over a banana. She stood back up, her face smiling proudly and her round breasts glistening from a spotlight in the dim bar..."

So, what does this have to do with elections?

Let me disgress for a moment. TO ME, elections should embody the fundamentals of what America was built on: the ideals of honesty, integrity, truth, justice, liberty and all those good things. An election should be based on groups of people with beliefs on how to make life better for their fellow citizens, their country and even the world. At election time, these people should present their beliefs passionately and honestly to the people that will vote for or against them. They should be critical of their opponents and welcoming to the same. They should not insult the citizenry or the processes in place. It should come down to facts, truth, approach and integrity. That's the way I THINK it should be. Aside from the total naivety of what I just typed, I think my principle is sound.

So what do Fogarty and The Stripper have to do with elections? Well, it seems as though the Democratic candidate for Virginia's Senate, Jim Webb, seat wrote several fictional novels years ago and Fogarty and company were one of many steamy scenes from Webb novels that have been appearing lately on right-wing websites. Supporters of George Allen, the Republican candidate, he been trying to smeer Webb's name by calling him a smut-monger and degenerate. What does this have to do with REAL issues?

George Allen himself is floating in questionable moral waters after publically calling one of Webb's young staffers, "Macacca" (Ma-Ka-Kaa) and publically telling the young man of Indian decent, "Welcome to America! Welcome to the Real Virginia!" This was a debacle for Allen because Macacca means 'monkey' in the language his parents speak. Allen swore he had no idea what it meant, and claimed that it was just some 'non-sense' word he heard a member of his staff use. And for the record, the young man in question was born in VIRGINIA! George Allen was born in CALIFORNIA. Now other incidents of racial accusations against Allen are beginning to surface. While I hate racist assholes, I still haven't heard much on the issues from either candidate in the Commonwealth.

Across the Potomac in Maryland, two important races are bringing out the racists, the liars and the hardline heavyweights. For Senate we have:
Fighting out of the BLUE corner, weighing in at 189 pounds with 20 years in DC, Ben "Smoking Votes" Cardin!
and
Standing tall in the RED corner, weighing in at a ready 198 pounds, Michael "Don't make me call my ex-brother-in-law Mike Tyson on you" Steele!
For the record Democrat Cardin is white and Republican Steele is black.

This battle has brought out Cardin staffers being accused of eating OREO cookies to degrade Steele. Black folks at Morgan State University have been accused of throwing OREOs on stage while Steele was speaking. Cardin's commercials stress the fact that Steele gave the 2004 keynote speech at the GOP convention, and he is a loyal supporter of Dubba-ya. Personally, if you are a member of a party and the president is the head of your party, supporting him isn't the craziest thing in the world. Still few issues here but heavy on nastiness.

Steele's people claim that while Cardin has been in politics for 40 years he hasn't changed a thing in Washington. They play this point to insanity on TV and radio. For a minute, I was looking sideways at Cardin myself until I did my homework and found out that Cardin was a state delagate for 20 years and a member of the DC set for 20 years. While 2 decades is a long time, it is not the 40 years that Steele's camp is implying. Steele has also been trying this weird little game of sort-of-trying to act like he's not a Republican [in the evil sense of the word] - it's thin, very thin - but he's trying. Where do he and Cardin stand on stem cell research, taxes, crime, the war, my kids education, my job security, my health care rates, my elderly mom and dad? Who knows - I haven't been able to catch a debate lately, but I WILL before "E" day. (psst, just between us - there is no way in hell I'm going to help the Republicans get another seat in the Senate. I don't care what color he is, I don't care how friendly he looks and I don't care if he likes puppies! You must be crazy if you think I'd vote for Steele!)

Also in Maryland, the Governors race has come down to the Mayor of Baltimore - Democrat Martin O'Malley vs encumbant Republican Robert Ehrlich. These two are trying to present a somewhat politically motivated battle. It's thin, but they are trying. Simply put, the big issue is Baltimore. Baltimore - the former "Charm City USA" is sitting in the crapper right now. Crime is high, murders are high, Education is shameful on a NATIONAL level, herion is like water running down the streets, gangs are out of control. Basically, you are only safe in about 50% of the city. Safe being that you have a reasonable expectation of going to work and coming home in one piece. Now, O'Malley, into his 7th police chief in 7 years wants to do for Maryland what he has done for Baltimore.

These two are pushing hard at each other. Not heavy on the issues, but moreso on calling the other a pitiful joke and the other one declaring, "No, no - YOU'RE a bigger joke than me!" Sorry "O" but I've seen my hometown up close. It's fucked up and you have no clue as to how to un-fuck it. I can't put you in the Statehouse this time. Lock some of those B-More thugs, drug dealers and hoodlums up, come up with an education plan that can REALLY work, pay your teachers, cops and fire fighters better, and get a serious re-hab program in place and next time, my vote is yours. This time, I think its going to Ehrlich.

So, there we have it. Local politics is just like national politics. Nasty, dirty business where skeletons [no matter how big or small] will get dragged out of your closet. Nobody seems willing to say "These are my plans for taxes. This is what I'll do about crime. I feel this way about stem cells. I'll vote this way on abortion. The environment is important to me because of this..." Naw - folks just want to play the race card; folks just care about who you had sex with back when; folks just want to twist the truth about this or that. Somehow - that just seems Un-American to me.

TTBM

Black Cartoons - MIA?

After watching my youngest child running around proclaiming to be Handy Manny, I took a long hard look at the state of television entertainment for Black children.

Now before I lose all of my good daddy credits, I want to make it clear that my kids don't sit around all day staring blankly at the television, but reality is reality and they do have their favorites shows.

Handy Manny is a decent little show - it centers around a friendly, young Latino man and his talking tools. Almost all of his neighbors are Latino and the show slips in as much Spanish as a typical American audience can handle. This show, the newest member in the Latino Cartoon Invasion, was the straw that broke the camel's back with me, because it clearly shows just how woefully under-represented Black people are in children's cartoons! I understand that Latinos are pouring into our country in amazing numbers everyday both legally and illegally - but the mass media [AGAIN] is devaluing the Black audience.

Black people are disproportionately unrepresented in television and in movies - that's no big secret and its far from new. But I am very distrurbed by the fact that now the mass media is reaching out so agressively to welcome and embrace the Latino children's audience. It is as if Black kids aren't even worth an effort in the world of children's cartoons!

I actually asked a few of my Black contemporaries to "Name a Black Cartoon." We all said the same thing you just said - Fat Albert! Now - I will say that there is at least one other Black cartoon, "The Proud Family." But sadly, The Proud Family is disappointing at best. Many of the storylines deal with issues that are fairly ghetto minded: Hoochie dancin'; stealin'; being disrespected, dealing with hoodlums, etc. I know that a lot of folks in the entertainment industry believe anything Black on film has to "be keepin' it real," but "keepin' it real" doesn't have to mean cookouts and crime . My little kids - My Little Black Kids - don't need "keepin' it real" with booty shakin', guns, fightin', drinkin' and bling wavin'. My Little Black Kids deserve the same alphabet learning, number learning, positive images and inspired storylines that White and Latino kids get shown by other White and Latino people.

This Latino Cartoon Invasion [as I call it] consists of some very nice cartoons - let me make that point crystal clear. Most of these shows are educational and have positive stories and include: Captain Carlos, Dora the Explorer, Go Diego Go , Dragon Tales and Maya & Miguel. It took me just three seconds to come up with these few names. But the only cartoon based on Black characters is The Proud Family. Pitiful.

Fortunately, I have been seeing and hearing a lot about an educational cartoon created by and starring Andre 3000 called "The Class of 3000" and my fingers are crossed real tight that this will be a cartoon with a Black lead that I can be proud of. (No pun intended)

TTBD

Ordinary People VS John Legend

Not too long ago I was driving and John Legend's "Ordinary People" came on the local jazz station, 105.9. The words escape me to adequately describe how much I hate this song. But hey - this is a BLOG, so I'll try...

Check this portion out:

"Maybe we'll live and learn
Maybe we'll crash and burn
Maybe you'll stay, maybe you'll leave,
maybe you'll return
Maybe another fight
Maybe we won't survive
But maybe we'll grow
We never know baby youuuu and I
We're just ordinary people
We don't know which way to go..."

I hate this song because it clearly makes normal people seem too stupid to find a decent relationship. It makes fights, drama and heartache seem like an everyday part of loving relationships. Too many people foolishly believe that you have to be some kind of EXTRAordinary person to have a loving relationship where arguments and drama are at a minimum. Frankly I think that is straight bullshit. Every relationship on this planet is made up of ordinary people, it's just that some people want and demand more from their partners than others do. That's it. Plain and simple. If you have self respect and you've established that you will only accept certian things in a relationship - then there you are.

The thing that really blows my mind is all these people are falling all over themselves with how wonderful and deep that song is!

All this, "we're just ordinary people, we don't know which way to go," baloney! Please John, don't believe your own hype, your song sucks!

TTBM

"Jungle Fever" (15 years later)

It's 2:30 in the morning.
Why the hell am I still awake?

Anyway...

"Jungle Fever" is on HBO so I figured, what the heck. I'd check it out.

I had forgotten what a good movie it is. Very powerful and packed with great acting and writing!
And, of course the countless Stevie Wonder tracks sprinkled throughout the movie are a perfect touch!

I don't know how I had managed to forget about the "War Counsel" meeting between - Drew (Lonette McKee), Vera (Veronica Webb), Nilda (Phyllis Yvonne Stickney), Inez (Theresa Randel) and Angela (Pamela Tyson)... where the five Black women meet to discuss Black men and White women after Flipper (Wesley Snipes) was caught with Angie (Annabella Sciorra).

The dialogue and the acting in this 8 minute section of the movie is absolutely stellar. These women are bringing real concerns and real feelings before the camera - whether they belong to the actresses or just the characters is beside the point. The performance is amazing.

I find it interesting that almost all of the things these women say I have either read on blogs or said on mine. It makes me wonder if Spike Lee was so far ahead of his time when he wrote this prior to '91 or are some of us men and women, Blacks and Whites still staring at each other across a chasm?

Other scenes that have passed since I fired my laptop up, which fall under the AMAZING category:

-Drew throwing all of Flipper's stuff out onto the street with a passionate yelling and screaming assault on him.

-Angie's father beating the hell out of her after he finds that she's sleeping with a Black man. Very dramatic.

-Ozzie Davis (Flipper's father) dramatically and stoically presenting his disgust of the relationship between his son and a White woman.

-The NYPD pulling up on Flipper and Angie while the two of them were play-wrestling and drawing their guns on Flipper after getting a call of a "Black man assaulting a White woman." With Flipper against a wall and a cop with his gun in Flipper's ear, Angie declares, "He's my lover! My boyfriend! Stop!" And Flipper is screaming in fear, "Shut up Angie! Shut up! We're just friends! I'm not her lover! She doesn't know what she's saying!"

What a powerful movie!

TTBM

Always tryin' to look hard...

I just got back in my house from running to the store and I have a question.

"Why in the Hell do so many young Black males try so hard to look angry and scary all the damn time?"

As I was turning onto the main street in my area I see an approaching car with right-of-way, so I let it pass. As it gets closer I see that there are four young Black men (in their mid-twenties) inside. The windows are down and two of them are looking in my general direction. I throw a nod to them [the way some of us guys say, 'hello'] and I notice that they are looking right at me scowling - their faces are tight and twisted like they're ready to fight me! I see this caveman-like behavior all too frequently from young Black males.

I just want to know why? I mean why, do these young males want to look so hard; like they are ready to fight to the death at a moments notice? Like no one in the WORLD is supposed to look in their direction? Is that supposed look manly? Look tough? It doesn't - it looks stupid, anti-social, and primative - it looks like these fools have no proper upbringing and no common decency!

Let me just go ahead and put it all out there since this is my damn blog - White Americans [for the most part] don't look at Black people as intellectual equals. Many whites believe that Blacks are just not as smart as them. Even the ones that act nice and friendly and sweet - deep down believe that they are smarter than 99.9% of Black people. This is a challange that I always try to stand posed for. Whenever I feel that my intellect is being challenged because of the color of my skin - I step up! I step up with knowledge learned from books, from lectures, from school, from friends, from family and from life - and I put those who doubt me in their place. And I don't do it just for me, I do it for all Black people, I do it to put anyone who doubts us,on their heels! This is the fight I prepare for.

The guys I saw in the car today are the same kind of guys that are probably looking for any reason to physically fight somebody. Step on their tennis shoes - they fight you! Accidentally brush into them coming into a store - they fight you! Look at them too long to figure out why they're looking at you - they fight you! They had their hats on sideways, a couple of them had all these damn dreads or twists or whatever-the-hell you call them shooting all over the damn place and they're all frowned up scowling at ME! And I'm just like... WHY? Why all the f*cking anger? Why all the frowning and anti-social demeanor?

I understand that young Brother's want to feel manly, but damn-it - I hate the fact that they come across so damn inhuman about it. Like they want to look so damn scary that nobody is brave enough to great them with a simple, common, courteous - Hello. I believe it is this quasi-hard street mentality that leads to so much violence between young Black males. They spend so much time trying to look and act anti-social that they don't develop true social skills.

Now I'm the one scowling...

TTBM

The Dumocrats...

I vote as a DEMOCRAT.

I don't do it for any great sense of loyalty or because my parents did it - I vote Democrat because it is the lesser of two evils. I don't trust Republicans and I don't believe that they have the majority of Americans' best interest in mind. And I don't mean just Black Americans, I mean any and every American that earns less than six figures a year. I think the Republicans are classists and eliteist and I don't trust them.

However, for every sneaky and greedy Republican we have on the Hill, we have a weak, confused, self-defeating, desperate Democrat trying to figure out which way is up.

So, it comes down to voting for a nasty Pitbull that will rip your throat out, the first chance it gets. Or voting for a fat and sloppy Bulldog, that usually does nothing but is still worthy of a pat on the head and a wipe of its drool.

But, it's time to kick my Bulldog right square in the ass.

It seems as though a Voters Identififcation Bill recently passed through congress, 228 to 196 - strictly along party lines. With Republicans winning. This Bill requires that all voters present legal state identification when they vote in all elections. Considering that there are over 12,000,000 illegal Mexican aliens in this country, I absolutely think that people should verify their legal citizenship when voting in American elections!

The Democrats don't.

The Democrats feel as though having millions of ILLEGAL Mexicans voting for congress and the Presidency will hurt the Republicans and help them! My basic comment to this is, "How f*cking desperate are the Democrats?" They have to resort to manipulating the balance of power between law abiding Americans and criminal aliens who have snuck into our country illegally. Instead of stepping up to the plate politically and becoming a strong and proud party again, the Democrats are stooping to nothing more than common pandering for votes and power.

Lord knows I hate to side with Republicans, but they clearly understand the dangers that voting without ID present in this country. Our entire political landscape could change over night with 12,000,000 votes for either the worst candidate in offices, or for every Latino candidate, or for any number of predetermined schemes or plans.

This is VOTING we are talking about here! Deciding on who sits on Capital Hill and approves our laws and runs our country... and the Dumocrats don't think people should present an ID when making this decision!

Frankly:
I took a book out at the library last weekend - I needed to present ID!
I stopped by the spot and bought some Heinekins - I needed to present ID! I bought some Gatorade and chicken wings and used my check/Visa - I needed to present ID!

It seems to me, that if insignificant sh*t like borrowing books, buying beer and throwing down on chicken wings involves some for of verifying just who in the hell I am, then it seems like choosing a president should warrant at least the same!

Let me, as a voting American tell you Dumocrats how to start winning Senate Seats, and House Seats and Oval Office Seats - You stop acting like a bunch a pansy's scared to call the Republicans out! When the Republicans do illegal, immoral, and unethical stuff, call their asses on the carpet and do it on CNN, CSPAN, MSNBC, CBS, ABC and NBC! You Dumocrats need to stop acting afraid of polls and stats that are spun, reworked and spun again to make you look bad. You need to stop worrying about these dumb-assed undecided voters - fuck them basically - their votes are here today and gone tomorrow, they are naive and worthless. Find your base, reach out to them and say, "I will represent you with unfailing strength and integrity!" The Democrats have not said this since Clinton was in office! You have to reach out to use and make us believe that you are NOT scared of the Republicans, because frankly I think most Democrats are weak, punk-b*tches - scared to stand up to the immoral Republican masses. Show me some f*cking heart! Show us all some f*cking heart!

I believe the votes in this country lie between $30K and $80K a year; between High School grads and the folks with 26 college credits; they lie between the school teachers and the electricans! In other words, the votes to win the major offices in this country lie with the majority of everyday people. Reach out to them and show them your voice and make them believe that you will be stronger tomorrow than you are today! You do this - and AMERICANS will vote for you and you will NOT need to use the votes of millions of criminals.

TTBM

Alternatives - to giving love a bad name...

A few posts ago I wrote about women who give LOVE a bad name. These women allow themselves to be neglected by the men they think they love. These women [and some men] allow themselves to be continually mistreated because they think love justifies the abuse heaped upon them.

Then fellow blogger Evia said...

"I can appreciate that this irks you because it beyond irks me , but can you present some alternatives for these sistas?"

I think the alternatives to allowing ones-self to be another persons doormat, lies within the person themselves.

SELF ESTEEM:
FIRST and FOREMOST women have to get a grip on the whole self-esteem issue! It wasn't until recent years that I began to understand just how big self-esteem is to women. I think women with low to no self esteem will allow men to emotionally dog them and drag them down into the gutter. These women use men and mens affections to find VALIDATION in themselves. Women, please stop this bullsh*t. Yeah, its easy for me to say, I'm a guy. But, my gender aside - I know I am somebody special without a woman on my arm! Look in the mirror and say the same thing about yourself!!!

If you are reading this and are saying, "Oh, you just don't understand. It's hard to have high self esteem..." To you I say, stop making excuses, lift that damn chin of yours up and declare that you are worthy! Say that sh-t out loud 20 times if you need to! But, you have to bring it into being and you have to do it yourself!

And if you find yourself involved with people that want to step on your self esteem once you've built it up - say to them, "I don't need you and I don't need this!"

You don't need anybody in your life that is not holding a watering can and a spade when they come to see you!

Now, let me explain that: See, your self esteem is like a rose bush that you have planted and watched grow for years and years. The people you let into your life have to interact with this rose bush. You will find some that want to clip and cut your blooms and others that just want to trample into it - these are the negative people... you kick these people in the ass and get them out of your life, they do NOTHING good for your self esteem. Then on the other hand, you have the people with the watering can and the spade - they always add some water to the bush's roots and they always sprinkle a little fertilizer at the base of your bush. You keep these people around because they keep your self esteem healthy and upright!

COMPLETION:
Before I got married, I had my fair share of dates. When I wasn't dating or didn't have a girlfriend - I still had MYSELF, a valid, decent, caring and compassionate person. Everyone has to find the qualities that make you a valid person to yourself. Ain't no man in the world gonna' make you anymore valid with his presence than your are without it! This whole "You complete me" bullsh*t that Tom Cruise dropped in 'Jerry McGuire' - it sounded great in the movie and it was real smooth when he used it, but ladies - that was HOLLYWOOD, and you all live in the real world! That concept is bullsh*t, nothing more.

If you are not complete before you meet your man, you never will be complete!

If you are walking around thinking that you need a man to complete you, and then you find a man and you foolishly think that you are complete, and your man leaves, dies or divorces you... you will find yourself in a world of sh*t because now you will be incomplete again. This is why I say the 'you complete me' concept is bullsh*t. Ladies, you complete yourselves! Don't use a man to validate yourself!

NEEDING vs WANTING:
Another alternative to 'Giving Love a Bad Name' is to stop 'needing' your man, ladies. Yeah - STOP NEEDING YOUR MAN!!! No REAL man wants to be needed! We want to be WANTED! When you ladies NEED a man, what you are doing is you are putting your life in his hands. You are putting your physical and mental and emotional essence in his hands and demanding that he not drop you! And when he drops you, you lie there at his feet for him to pick up and reassemble as he sees fit. That's why we see these broken women allowing their 'men' to treat them like crap, they have been emotionally dropped by their men and their men have put them back together in a weaker and needier format built around the man and his WANTS. Thus these women allow themselves to be dogged and to be playthings.

Ladies, if you don't WANT your man, then don't be with him.It IS as simple as that.

How can you tell a WANT from a NEED. Try this...
WANTS make life better, NEEDS make you live.

Example:
You NEED air to breathe, without it you die:
Don't NEED your man, because you may do stupid things just to keep him for fear of emotional death.

You WANT icing on your cake, sweeter cake tastes better:
A good, loving man holding your hand on a sandy beach, makes the beach a little nicer. He accents the beach, he doesn't make it sandy and warm.

The man you WANT will more than likey be a good person and the best person to protect your heart.

Building your own self esteem, being a complete person alone and wanting what is best for your heart will prepare you for the true love you desire and it will show you the power and greatness of love. It will not bring you the abused and painful love of those who know not what it is.

TTBM

What Fathers do...

DOUGLAS MARTIN was a husband and a father of six daughters.

I knew Mr. Martin very indirectly - I may have actually spoken to him 2 or 3 times and I'd probably waved 'hello' to him the same number of times.

On September 14th 2006, he and three of his daughters were swimming near the 78th street pier in Ocean City. With hurricane Florence blowing strong in the Atlantic about the same time, the northeastern US seaboard had been plagued with strong, dangerous riptides. Mr. Martin and his girls got caught up in such a riptide. They were separated from each other and he swam to shore to make sure everyone was okay. When he got there, only his 17 year old daughter had made it back safely. Mr. Martin turned back to the sea and did what father's do - he went back for his children.

It turns out that his 13 year old daughter had been lucky and smart enough to let herself float on her back and get washed out to sea, where she was rescued by an off-duty beach patrol officer. Mr. Martin and his 15 year old, Amy, were found a short time later by the Coast Guard and taken to Atlantic General Hospital where he was pronouced dead on arrival and where she died an hour later.

Over the last few days I have thought about these events for hours and hours. Their deaths reinforce the fact that we have to give love to those around us every chance we get. What was an innocent moment of family fun - a quick swim before dinner - turned to devastating tragedy in only a few minutes. What was a happy family of eight, was in the blink of an eye changed to a grieving family of six. I'm sure that morning Mr. & Mrs. Martin had no idea that that would be their last morning waking up together.

In my mind, I've tried to imagine what Mr. Martin was thinking when he realized that two of his children were in mortal danger. Swimming out to them with water splashing around him, rip currents pulling like strong arms at his whole body, yelling and screaming his girls names. I'm positive that he had no thoughts of his own impending death, I'm positive that he had no idea that the 46 years of life that he had were about to end in a few minutes. I'm positive that his only thoughts were of a life without two of his girls and this is a life that he was swimming frantically to prevent. If they weren't coming back, then HE wasn't coming back.

I know there are millions of fathers who would risk and give their lives without a second of thought to protect their children. But to have actually encountered a man that would be called upon to make that exact sacrifice is humbling. To me, it defines the man. To me, it is the example of what a MAN does, and it is the best example of what a FATHER does.

Rest in peace, Douglas and Amy.

THBM

You Give Love a Bad Name...

I ran into an acquaintance of mine not too long ago. She didn't look happy.

Not that I am in the best shape of my life, but she had noticeably gained weight. Years ago, when she was married, I remember that she had gained weight towards the end when she was really getting emotionally beaten down. It was then that her husband started neglecting her and he started cheating on her and eventually he left her and their child for a white woman. This acquaintance of mine, bucked up though. She lifted her head up and made incredible strides in improving her health, her professional status and became a super mom! I had a great deal of respect for her accomplishments.

One thing stood out though. She always had this 'hungry' tone in her voice when she spoke about her ex-husband. He did some doggy sh-t to her after he left her, real ignorant, unforgivable stuff. Even after he married the woman he left her for, she still had this weird tone in her voice when she talked about him. I call it 'weird' because frankly it sounded like she still had deep feelings for him. After the terrible things he did to her, it made me uncomfortable to hear the hunger in her voice, when she spoke about him. Okay - okay - enough beating around the bush... I knew she still wanted him, and I knew eventually he was going to be having his cake and eating it too!!! I was right.

Now, she's got what she wants. Homeboy has left his mistress/wife and come back to his sister, even though he hasn’t re-married her. And now, she doesn't look happy. She's gained her weight back and she's done some things that have given him tremendous control over her life. If you ask her why, she shrugs her shoulders and mumbles, "Because, I love him."

I can't begin to tell anyone how angry it makes me when women allow men to do some of the most insensitive, unthoughtful, cruel and self-centered things in the world to them all in the name of LOVE. Now, I know some men are stupid and let women do all kinds of dumb things to them too, and they come moping around talking about, "but I love her..." But, by and by with all things being equal, most guys with a ‘set’ will tolerate but so much BS before telling their women, "Baby, it's over. I'm done with this nonsense!" I've had to do this a couple of times myself and it's not that hard to do once the BS gets knee deep.

From my perspective, Women are the major culprits when it comes to letting yourself get treated like crap all in the name of love. These women give Love a bad name!

Love is not a permission slip for people to treat others like dirt. Love does not give one person a free-pass to treat another person like sh-t. Love is not something someone uses to humiliate and degrade another person. Love is not what someone feels when they lie to you, cheat on you, and manipulate you. Love is not what is going on between you and your man when he comes home smelling like women's perfume and sweat. Love is not what you have when your man would rather be in jail than in your arms. Love is not the time you spend in your man's arms crying after he has finished beating your ass. Love is not your man forgetting to pick you up from the bustop in the rain, while he's playing Madden with his boys. Love is not the baby your man made with the girl down the street when he had that week moment in April.

Is my point clear here?

I think there are significant self-esteem issues here. The old dreaded ‘self esteem’ - the main cause for over eating, sleepless nights, suicide, promiscuity, drug use and any countless number of problems that young women have. And here again, the lack of self-esteem causes some of these women to think they need the so-called ‘love’ of these sorry assed guys in their lives. This whole thing makes me so angry.

"I love him, even though he hits me..."
"I love him, even though he cheats a little..."
"I love him, even though he doesn’t know he loves me..."
"I love him, even though he doesn’t talk to me..."

Nothing would make me happier than to have these women stop allowing men to just run them over with bullshit all in the name of love. Damn-it, these women need to stop blaming Love for their own foolishness. Love is a good thing. Love is respect, commitment, consideration and thoughtfulness. These women that say, "My man treats me bad, but I love him," they are doing nothing more than furthering the favorite mottos of other women:

"...all men are dogs"
and
"...men don't know how to be faithful."

For the sake of the millions of men OF ALL RACES that know how to treat our women, stop using love as an excuse for not leaving a loser! Stop claiming to love guys that just aren’t worth your time! Stop using love to wash away the fact that your man treats you like a carpet! Just stop giving love a bad name! Find a way to look in the mirror and tell yourself, "I deserve better."

TTBM

September 11th 2006

Here on September 11th 2006, like many Americans, I can't help but think about where I was and what was going on five years ago today. There's so much about that time that stands out with me and will forever be a part of my memories.

-The second plane flying past the window live on Good Morning America...
-The replays of the second plane smashing into the corner of WTC Building 2...
-The first building falling...
-The second building falling...
-People jumping from windows...
-The Pentagon burning out of control...
-Lower Manhattan in a cloud of smoke and dust...
-The thousands of New Yorkers covered in dust and dirt...

I also remember the images of Donald Rumsfeld at the Pentagon helping to load injured people onto helicopters. I thought it was very decent of the Secretary or Defense to not drive off in his black Suburban, but to instead stand with his people and to help the injured. His political affiliation meant nothing at that time.

I also remember in the days immediately following 9/11, President George Bush was at Ground Zero giving a speech to the recovery workers. Someone far away from him yelled something that he couldn't hear, but he responded impressively by yelling back something like, "I can't exactly hear you, but one thing I can say is that the people that brought down these towers are going to hear from all of us!" My feelings for the president aside, especially after the whole "My Pet Goat" incident, he looked and sounded presidential this day. He looked and sounded like a man that was ready to kick some terrorist ass. And, honestly - I wanted to see some asses kicked after 9/11.

Then the months began to wear on before we finally made it to the Taliban. (Yawn)

Then we somehow ended up in Iraq fighting Saddam, and I was like, "What's going on here?"

Then, shortly after Baghdad fell, when asked about the so far unsuccessful hunt for the 9/11 mastermind, Osama bin Laden, President George W. Bush said in a press conference, "Well, I don't spend a lot of my time thinking about him anymore..." The writing on the wall became crystal clear for me at that moment, and now on 9/11/2006 my feelings haven't changed one bit.

Osama bin Laden will never be captured while Republicans have the White House.

Republicans need fear.

If Osama bin Laden is captured, we Americans don't really get any safer. There are plenty of radicals out in the world that will continue to pose a threat to America. However, there are many people that may disagree with this position. Many Americans would breathe a sigh of relief if Osama was captured or killed. They'd relax, they'd calm down, they'd feel like al qaeda has been shut down, they'll stop being afraid. And the Republicans would NOT be happy.

The Republicans use fear and terrorism as catalysts to get undecided voters to vote Republican! Republicans are MASTERS at voter manipulation. When they need some votes, they roll out Gay Marriage, or Oil Prices or Terrorism! And, who is the poster boy from terrorism? Osama bin Laden. Republicans use him, his image and American hatred towards him as a rally point and focus point when they want to sell the terrorism angle or take peoples mind’s off of the latest Republican screw-up or scandal. There is no way the Bush Administration is going to throw away their ace in the hole while he is so valuable for scaring voters and Americans in general.

So we will continue to be lied to. Bush’s Administration will continue to swear that they are doing all they can do to capture bin Laden. They will continue to put his face in front of us to take our minds off of high gas prices, corporate corruption, redistricting, underhanded lobbying, the eroding environment and our dying troops. They need him loose and on the run.
I say let's wait until late August 2008, right during the run for the White House before Osama bin Laden turns up on a slab in US custody. What a better way for Bush to go out of the White House, than to take Osama out of play for the Democrats?